THE VOTES ARE IN
You can stop voting now! Wait till next week for the results of the brainwashed vote for the best of 1999. Why should we care about another list of the best of '99? Because we all chose these ones, right? Well, just read this thing next week!

TORTOISE LIVE IN CHICAGO
Bidding farewell to the Lounge Ax, Tortoise will play a special show there this upcoming Thursday, January 6th.

Y2K GLITCH
Sorry about the year glitch on brainwashed's clock above - should be fixed next week.

2 MORE WEEKS TO ORDER SHIRTS
Okay, I know we mention it every week but if we didn't then people will whine that we didn't let them know. So, order a shirt now and choose from an array of colors, styles and specialty sizes. Order a shirt later and get only one color...

CLOUD-ZERO
The machines which host Cloud-Zero (the Legendary Pink Dots mailing list) will be physically moved from one office to another, and a lot of software will be installed and re-installed. Therefore, cloud-zero will be up and down intermittantly during the week of January 4th - returning to full functionality by January 9th. Hopefully, subscribers will notice only occasional delays, and not lost e-mail.

HOLLYFELD.ORG
From Dan Garcia, Owner of Hollyfeld.org:

Some of you may have noticed that Hollyfeld.org has been down since sometime on Friday December 31st. The good news is that the machines, mail server, webserver, mailing lists, etc... are all still there and intact, and in fact are connected to the internet and functioning. Unfortuantely, however, on Friday December 31st, the machines that house our nameservers were broken in to, and their configurations destroyed. We are waiting for the person who maintains those machines to rebuild them so that they can start name service again. Unfortunately, without nameservers, no email can get through, and people cannot get to web addresses and such.

I am currently in the process of supporting the restoration of those machines, and in addition, I am currently securing a handful of backup nameservers, which are at separate sites, and should be able to provide backup should something like this happen again in the future.

Thank you all for your patience and support. In the meantime, I can be reached at Kender42@Yahoo.com.

CURTIS MAYFIELD
Long before gangsta rap, there was Superfly.

"I'm your Mama, I'm your Daddy, I'm that nigga in the alley. I'm your doctor when in need, want some coke - have some weed." - Pusherman.

ELPH, "20' TO 2000"
Alas, the final installment of the 20 minutes to 2000 series from Germany's Raster-Noton label. ELpH (a.k.a. Coil) constructs the December issue, the most interesting and least minimal bit from the entire series. On the CD it says "elph.zwölf," the only words spoken (albeit electronically processed and repeated) in the 20 minute long track. (For those who don't speak German, elf = eleven and zwölf = twelve, quite appropriate for the twelfth release of the series.) What separates this release from nearly all of the rest of the series is the fact that this track is actually interesting, moving and evolving over the entire 20 minutes. Low drones open up, rhythmic electronic loops and clicks come in, sound builds with swirling electronic voices added to the mix, drones get louder to a climax and then it quiets down towards the end, ending on a festive fanfare, destructed almost v/vm-like, short and sweet. This disc will no doubt be the most sought-after and difficult to find of the entire series, all of which have pressings limited to around 1,000 copies. Best of luck! - Jon Whitney

LAUB, "INTUITION"
Not just your regular remix album. This one kicks major booty with tracks from previous Laub CDs that have been reworked by folks like Pole, Schneider TM and Coldcut. A climactic symphonic opening track remixed by Clifford Gilberto opens the disc which kicks into a fierce overdrive within about a minute, using a drum and bass style played drum kit, upright bass, jazzy piano and various other classical instruments. Gonzales remixes "Wake Up" into a mesmerizing head-bobbing funky stepping tune, Full Swing reworks "Welt Weg" into captivating pulsing tone bursts, Pole give us a static electronic version of "Grau," Elektronauten and Mathias Schaffhauser each present liquid dubby drifting sounding remixes, and Schneider TM gives us a dense distorted remix of Urlaub. Various others round out the rest of the disc with equally impressive and unique revamped versions ranging from more thumping jagged drum and bass influenced beats, distorted noise gems and complex post-kraut rock electronica. For those not yet into Laub, this is a great starting point with over an hour and 12 fresh remixes by some other excellent artists. - Jon Whitney

"THE REPERCUSSIONS OF ANGELIC BEHAVIOR"
Bill Rieflin (Ministry, the Revolting Cocks, KMFDM, SWANS, NIN, etc), Robert Fripp and Trey Gunn (King Crimson) first pooled their impressive talents on Rieflin's debut solo album from earlier this year, "Birth of a Giant", also on First World Records. "The Repercussions of Angelic Behavior" is 53 minutes of instrumental improvisations from the same sessions. Whereas the majority of the tracks on "BoaG" were well crafted experimental pop songs, the 10 untitled tracks found here are little more than self indulgent, masturbatory jamming ... unfocused, leftover session fodder better left in the vaults. The music ranges from laid back ambient atmospheres, courtesy of Fripp and Gunn's unique guitar tones, to rapid-fire and somewhat random, headache inducing guitar/drum/bass noise blasts. There's a lot of talent in the room but to my ears there's a serious lack of soul. I'm sure the prog rock / acid jazz crowds would be able to find whatever it is they find in this sort of stuff ... but it does nothing for me. Save for three of the longer (7+ minute) tracks of the more ambient nature, "Repercussions.." is really disappointing. "Birth of a Giant" makes much better use of the talents of Rieflin, Fripp and Gunn (and several others) and remains one of my favorite new albums of 1999. Get it instead ... - Mark Weddle

THOMAS FEHLMANN "ONE TO THREE. OVERFLOW"
Fehlmann is an electronic musician with 20 years experience as a member of Palais Schaumburg and the Orb, producer/mixer for Sun Electric, and as a solo artist and re-mixer. Last year's "Good Fridge. Flowing", also on Apollo / R + S Records, collected 20 of his solo pieces from 1990 to 1998. "One to Three. Overflow" seems to be a collection of solo leftovers with 8 of the 12 tracks being re-mixes (of and by Fehlmann) and collaborations. This disc, beautifully mixed/produced by Fehlmann and mastered by Stefan Betke (aka Pole) has the same ambient-IDM flavored techno feel as "Flowing". The songs are bright and fluid, sexy and sublime ... thumpin' grooves to dance or chill out to. It's not quite like the Orb, but you can definitely tell that he is a member of the Orb. Fehlmann does a fine job of re-mixing Charles Wilp's "Charlies Angeles" and Infiniti's (aka Juan Atkins) "Never Tempt Me" (which is unfortunately marred by insipid spoken word lyrics). It's easy to see why he is in demand for re-mix and production work. In turn, "Superfrühstück" and "Wee Wee Mademoiselle", both originally from "Flowing", are re-mixed to great effect twice apiece by Plug Research and Fehlmann and To Rococco Rot and Sun Electric/Willekes Wille, respectively. The "Superfrühstück" mixes are an especially tasty blend of ambiance, smooth bass and beats. The final 2 tracks are collaborations of a more ambient/experimental nature: "Tuning" with Mute Records boss Daniel Miller and "FriedrichstraBe" with King Crimson guitarist Robert Fripp. Round it all off with 4 straight Fehlmann tracks mixed in and you have a surprisingly cohesive and solid 62 minutes of electronic music. As with "Flowing", this one features groovy minimal artwork courtesy of the Designers Republic. Worth every penny of the $16.75 import price tag ... - Mark Weddle

UAKTI, "AGUAS DA AMAZONIA"
I feel a little embarrassed browsing through my local record store's New Age section, but only a little. I find the latest album by the Brazilian group Uakti (wa-ka-chee), and am vindicated. Taking their name from a mythic creature whose body is ridden with holes and makes wonderful sounds as he runs and winds pass through him, Uakti here perform music composed for them by Philip Glass. Nine of the ten tracks (the last composed by Glass for ballet) are inspired by the rivers of the Amazon, hence the album title. Mostly percussion-lead (from homemade instruments to marimbas) with woodwinds and sparse keyboard accent, these pieces (which flow together seamlessly) don't really recall rushing water, nor the calm babble of brooks. They sew together bits of tribal warmth and airy classicism onto a frame that sounds a lot like Steve Reich's "Music For 18 Musicians"-era melodic minimalism. Allowing your mind to float free of association and physical sensation, this music is perhaps best suited for the waters of an isolation tank rather than tropical locales... brilliant and beautiful, nonetheless. - Jason Olariu

KRAFTWERK, "EXPO 2000"
Thirteen years since the last original material has come from the group known as Kraftwerk and we get this, a piece commissioned for something I know nothing about. The music is quite unexciting, four similar versions of a rather uninteresting song to begin with. A simple and moderate paced undoubtedly Kraftwerkian tune with computer generated vocals, repeating the basic theme of Expo 2000 over and over again. On the more positive side, the cover is pretty spiffy: a fractal-esque design which changes depending on how the cover is held in your hand. I'm interested to see if an album will ever develop, but this single is something just to own and not necessarily to listen to. - Jon Whitney

FANTASTIC PLASTIC MACHINE, "INTERNATIONAL STANDARD EP" US
What is it with the Japanese and their interest in releasing different music in different countries? More annoying than them goddamned European two parts, this remix EP has three different versions, three different tracklistings, yet one's released in Japan, one in Europe and one in North America. Each come in a matchbook style sleeve with four remixes of tracks lifted from 1999's album "Luxury." Fantastic Plastic Machine is Japanese DJ, magazine editor, radio personality Tomoyuki Tanaka, turned lounge and retro influenced producer/composer - a true Renaisance man. His full length albums have included friends which included The US EP features SWAMP's analogue drum machine heavy version of the campy chanting gem, "You Must Learn All Night Long," Los Amigos Invisibles remix of the disco revivalist, "Bossa for Jackie," (co written originally with Simon Fisher Turner), The Angel's remix of exotica influenced "Honolulu, Calcutta," and DJ Me DJ You's psychedelic swirling guitar and stoned out beats/late 60s film score sounding remix of "The Girl Next Green Door." It's a cute release and recommendable if you're already familiar and enjoy his music, but more recommendable would be the full lengther from 1999 - perhaps a review of that soon. - Jon Whitney

MR. HANKEY'S CHRISTMAS CLASSICS
A nice collection for the holiday spirit, even though the holiday has passed I thought this deserved a little bit of a mention. The tracks on this CD are mainly from this year's Christmas special. My personal favorites include Mr. Garrison's globally incorrect bit "Merry Fucking Christmas" as well as Hitler doing "O Tannenbaum" which segues into Satan's "Christmas Time In Hell," a joyous festive tune, also completely politically and morally incorrect. (Lady Di, Gene Siskel, Jeffrey Dahmer, Ghengis Khan, Mao Tse Tung and both JFK's are all celebrating the Christmas cheer in the underworld.) Other songs on the collection include stuff from the first Christmas special like Kyle's "The Lonely Jew on Christmas," "Santa Clause is On His Way" and Chef's "What Child is This?" Completely new tunes on here include the forgettable "Dead, Dead, Dead," and the half understandable duet between Kenny and Mr. Hanky, "The Most Offensive Song Ever." In closing, if there is any Christmas album to own in your collection, make sure it's highly offensive, loaded with cusses and entertaining. - Jon Whitney

BEST BOY ELECTRIC, "SONGS OF LATITUDE AND LONGITUDE"
Sometimes it gets quite difficult to describe something without using comparisons to others before them. While I really enjoy this, the charming and honest debut full-lengther from Best Boy Electric, the slow and melodic music combined with the hesitant vocals screams of influence of Galaxie 500, Bedhead and of course, Low. Best Boy is based in Madison, WI and features former Low bass guitarist John Nichols, who left the band to head to college. The album was produced in Duluth by Alan Sparhawk from Low and features a similar formula of simple drums, slow pace, melodic guitar lines, heart-felt bass strums and quiet keybaord background accompaniment. The lack of pop ditties and up-and-down stroked guitars doesen't necessarily warrant calling this "sad" music, so I'm confused where people get off on accusing bands like this of being as such. This should be an interesting band to watch develop over the next few years, as the singer sounds like he's just beginning to get comfortable with his voice. Those fans of the above mentioned bands would probably enjoy this as much as I did while if slow-core or shadow-pop isn't your style, it's most likely not for you. - Jon Whitney

AUBE, "SHADE-AWAY"
Packaged in a flimsy baggy with a black and white book of artwork, Art-IC Culture in Sweden brings this Aube release, constructed using only glass as the sound source. While each album from Aube utilizes one non traditionally musical source, the sounds and music are never dull or boring. The music on "Shade-Away" is considerably more pulsing and rhythmic than older somewhat droney recordings. It features tones of clanging glass in spots as well as low end scraping, looped and modified. Crunched glass and crackling shards accent the appropriately titled track "Trample," while "Rebounce" sounds like it could be a bunch of drinking glasses rustling underneath a repeated loop of other tones. The packaging for Aube releases is usually unique to each release and frequently something completely new in general -- with examples like Metal de Metal housed in a metal sleeve, Pages from a Book housed in torn pages from the bible or Aqua Syndrome packaged in a liquid filled pastic baggy thing -- this one is somewhat of a let down but I guess a couple of pieces of glass could be bought to house this CD with book. - Jon Whitney

We know that sometimes these CDs are somewhat challenging to find, which is why we have a RECOMMENDED STORES section which can be used to obtain nearly everything available on the site.

TUESDAY
Dom & Roland - Can¹t Punish Me 12" [ltd to 2000 copies] (Moving Shadow, UK)
E-Z Rollers - RS2000 12" [ltd to 2000 copies] (Moving Shadow, UK)
* Goldie/Various - Incredible Sound of Drum'n'Bass CD (Ovum/Ruffhouse, US)
* Lo-Fidelity Allstars/Various - On the Floor at the Boutique CD (Columbia, US)

For a more comprehensive release schedule stretching far into the future, please check out the NEW RELEASES brought to you by Greg and Feedback Monitor.

FROM HELL
A nice dose of the flu these last couple of weeks has kept me from reading much more than comic books, and this hefty collection by Alan Moore and Eddie Campbell occupied me for a while. It's a retelling of the Jack the Ripper murders as a series of masonic rituals conducted by an insane royal physician trying to cover up the misdeeds of Queen Victoria's grandson. Taking a total of sixteen episodes, the book follows victims, killers, and investigators through a bewildering number of London locales. As the magical theme progresses, the locales become even stranger, mixing nineteenth and twentieth century cityscapes alongside grisly murder scenes. Alan Moore's story is well-paced, and his physician is an intriguing character, but I'm not convinced that this is the great graphic novel other reviewers have claimed it to be. The prime fault is Eddie Campbell's art which is workmanlike and even striking at times, but more often so sketchy and crudely drawn it seems he simply forgot to go back over the panels. Still, if you don't mind the cover price, it's a fairly entertaining work if a bit pedantic with its appendices. Iain Sinclair's novel White Chappell Scarlet Tracings, however, covers similar territory in a much more intriguing manner. - Paul McRandle

TOY WAR
It's the dawn of the 21st century and the Etoy/eToys battle rages on. It's important to watch this battle as a not-for-profit multi-national art coalition have lost their rights to operate on the web - just imagine if Sony Pictures decide to have a film called "brainwashed" and try to shut us down! A judge in California forced the closure of Etoy.com for the period of time that eToys brings their charges to Etoy to court. This has sparked a war over fairness - as Etoy had their domain 2 years before eToys. All legal experts agree that eToys will not win, simply because Etoy was there first. The judge didn't see it that way and Etoy's doors were closed conveniently in time for the Christmas shopping rush. Monitoring the progress on both toywar.com and rtmark.com, it's comforting to see the support from all over the world. Another interesting tidbit: eToys' stock price is now about 1/3 of what it was on November 29th, before the injunction was filed. Etoy gets brainwashed's support and brainwashed encourages everybody who cares to read up on the information presented by these sites and to get involved. Thanks.

MAYBE THEY WERE RIGHT
Well, many automated websites have had some great Y2K glitches this weekend. Check out some of the dates on these captured screenshots at go.to/y2kmistakes.

On the first page of the Coil site, it says information is on the news page.

- JJ, who says the last pick is for the purpose of letting out some of his "aggressive, confused and sex depraived seventeen year old emotions"